Not Surrendering

I’m struggling this week. In my mind it’s looked like an American football pile-up. I was taken out by one lie, and quickly ended up tackled under thousands of pounds of lies. But when I tried surrendering to God, my idea changed. Instead, I might be a horse pulling backward against God’s reigns, refusing to go through the swamp of emotions that lies before me. What is your experience with surrendering to God? Do you resist Him like I do sometimes?